Posted by: stephaniekathan | July 2, 2010

AM I WORTHY?

As I am sitting here at the computer tonight, contemplating the events of the day,looking back at the pleasant experiences with fondness, and looking for the lessons in the unpleasant ones something occurred to me….AM I WORTHY?

For the last couple of years I have been making my way back from a very dark, very lonely, very unhappy place within myself that made my outside circumstances almost unbearable…..but I made it. I made it back to that place inside myself where I am happy to get up in the morning, I have gained an understanding that I have control over my own thoughts, and by changing the way I think and feel inside the outside circumstances do change.

Every day is a learning experience, and I look forward to what each day will hold in store for me, because I know whatever it is…..I will grow from it. I will grow from the person I am to the person I want to be. I had an experience today, that I have been searching my soul about. The experience was extremely unpleasant, yet the more I looked within, the more I realized there was a lesson there I had to learn, and until I did I would be faced with the same lessons over and over again in different form, so I knew it would serve me to really really look, and this is what I found.

As you are growing, you are learning. You are going to make mistakes, bad choices, and at times you feel you are being judged….and you may be right. The lesson I learned today, is that ;
No matter what someone else says to me, or criticizes me for my lack of success, it does not mean it’s the truth, even if they are successful! The truth is only what I believe within myself.

I made the decision when I embarked on this deliberate journey to master myself, that I would face many challenges, many critics, and many hardships, but I knew the payoff would be extreme. Freedom. Something that I had previously never known, and I wanted it badly enough that I made the decision to do whatever I had to do to get it.

I was basically told today, that my accomplishments aren’t much, my website lacks in every area under the sun, and if I’m successful, how come only 6 people have watched my video? I was crushed. This was someone I had gone to for guidance, how could they treat me so badly, when they did not even know me or what I have come through? This person basically told me I was not worthy of a friendship, never mind a joint venture. And for a minute……ok longer than a minute…..I Almost believed them.

Then I remembered what my purpose is. I remembered that deep white hot burning desire I have that is the fuel to keep me moving in everything I do. Which is to show my sons that life is Possibility. So, I could let this person completely steal everything I have worked so hard at for over two years in a matter of a few typed words in an email……OR I could believe in myself, and remember that no matter how alone I may feel…..I never am.

Although this person may say so what? You interviewed John Assaraf, big deal! Anybody will give an interview to promote themselves! I know better! And when I gave myself pause to think about it……I realized that my interviews aren’t about selling, they are about serving, and creating awareness and that is why I do what I do. I know that at some point in their life, maybe after I’m gone from this earth my sons and maybe even my grandson will hear those interviews. And if they grasp just one piece of the wisdom that has been shared…..everything I have ever been through will have been worth it.

So when someone puts you down, or makes you feel like you aren’t worthy of love……Remember that you are. Am I worthy? Yes! Are You Worthy? YES!
And the really best part of the lesson I learned today…….is that all that has to happen in order for me to be worthy…..is for me to believe it. I will continue on my journey to create ripples of awareness, and learn how to advance in life everyday more than the day before. And along the way I know there will be teachers and guides to show me the way, and if I can’t find any on the outside……there is always one on the inside.

by

Stephanie Kathan

EnergyWorksWithMe.com

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Responses

  1. Stephanie- I applaud your braveness. You are truly one of the few willing to step out from behind the shields and masks we wear to speak and walk your truth.
    We need more wonderful, enthusiastic, Authentic, caring souls like yourself.

    Thank YOU for being YOU…..
    applaud, applaud , applaud

    • I am grateful that my words touch you Judy, and thank you for joining me on my journey.

  2. Awesome post Stephanie, and you are WORTHY! Don’t you ever believe any differently, you are touching many people in a very positive way! Keep up the great work you are doing!!

  3. YOU ARE TRUELY GIFTED AND AMAZING …
    YES STEPHANIE FAR IN THE FUTURE MANY WILL VIEW YOUR WORK AND BE THE BETTER IN MANY WAYS FOR IT
    BUT HERE AND NOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND THE SPIRIT YOU ARE CONSITANTLY DOING ALL IN IS BEAUTIFUL AND YOU ARE EXTREMLY WORTHY …… THANK YOU ..

    • Thank you so much for your support and encouragement : )


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