Posted by: stephaniekathan | April 7, 2010

Wearing the labels of others

My entire life, I have let the labels that others put on me define who I was. I was told I was fat, crazy, depressed, bi-polar,Despair to Aware paperback cover I was told I suffered from Post Traumatic Stress because of childhood events……the list goes on and on.  I had so many labels of others that I was wearing, I couldn’t see my authentic self anymore.

Family, teachers, even friends throw labels at us on a continuing basis, and they stick like a magnet…..If we let them.  As I went through life wearing these labels, my reality took on their appearance!  I became obese, I acted in crazy ways, I stayed in bed feeling powerless over my circumstances, I took medication the doctors called “happy pills”………I have come to learn that allowing all of those labels to define me was where the insanity was located!

Once I made a decision to become a deliberate creator of my own life, I began to shed the labels of others that I had been wearing my entire life.  As I dropped the labels one by one, and directed my own mind…..amazing things began to happen.  I began to feel lighter not only inside, but my physical self was shedding pounds as I was shedding labels!

I began to strengthen my confidence, my belief in myself and in my abilities began to get stronger, and as I faced each fear that had crippled me for so long, I began to see that I am stronger than any fear! By boldly facing my challenges head on, they became easier and easier to get through.

If you have spent your life wearing the labels that others have put on you, do yourself a favor…….let yourself decide who you are.  You are the only one who knows your thoughts, you are the only one, who knows your story, and you are the only one, who has the power to decide to shed the label, or continue to be weighed down by it.

I share my experiences in hopes that other people who are where I was will benefit.  And to make you aware that all is not  hopeless, all is not lost, and YOU are more powerful than you think.  You have the power within you to think  for yourself.  It is a gift that was given to every human being on this planet.  Don’t take it for granted, by letting the thoughts of others define your life.

Define your own life, You are what you believe you are……so why not believe in the magnificent self that you already have inside you waiting for you to discover it!


Stephanie Kathan

To learn more about the author, please visit



  1. Hi Stephahie

    This is so good to read! I celebrate your wisdom and courage.

    For far too long I allowed, not so much the labels, but more the expectations of others to dominate my life. It is as though at some point I decided that perhaps they were right all along. Maybe I did have ‘too many big ideas’: perhaps I was reaching for something that was above ‘my station in life’. And perhaps if I had towed the line and done what was required of me, I might have been happier.

    But NO! It didn’t work that way. I have not been unhappy particularly, but often unfulfilled. I did give in and follow the path of least resistance for many years, and that was not wrong for everyone else, but was wrong for me.

    And now, with a bucket load of experience of how not to do it, I am finally moving out of the ‘comfort zone’ and setting my sights even higher than they used to be. Mostly because I am listening to my gut feeling and going against all the early programming. I get a little scared at times, and it is quite a lonely road I travel at the moment. Yet, one I know I am destined to be on and soon it will feel more comfortable when I meet other travellers who can point the way for me when I get lost or can’t read the map.

    Thank you for opening my eyes a little wider, and empowering me with almost a vote of approval for my defiance.

    Love and Blessings


  2. Rita,
    You show great courage, and know that you are stronger than any fear you have. I congratulate you for being exactly who you are, and for taking the risks necessary to chart your own course in life. Keep up the Great work, you deserve everything you want in life, and you will have it. Believe in yourself, and Never Never Never give up on your dreams, your goals, or the person you want to be.

  3. Hi Stephanie,
    thank you for directing me to this wonderful article. I couldn’t agree more with what you are saying. In the words from the song “Unique” on the album “Resonations” you’re a diamond let your light shine.
    We are all so much more than the labels they gave us.

    I don’t know if you heard me interview Kathy Buckley on the Accidental Guru radio show. However she is a wonderful example of someone who really threw off the labels. I believe you would find her very inspiring, (she’s also very funny too)

    Again, thank you for sharing.
    With gratitude, Dov…

    • Dov,
      I’m learning much from wonderful teachers like you Dov, and I very much appreciate the encouragement and support. I am honored to work with you to create great ripples of awareness in the world….it’s working!

  4. I “woke up” about 9 months ago and decided to live my life with love and passion. I made little goals…starting dreaming again. I started reaching those little goals so I made bigger ones…then outrageous ones.

    After a few months of working on the inner me I starting working on the outward me….and the weight is coming off.

    So I believe and agree everything you are saying, at some point in our lifes we have to stand up and say “I get to decide how I want to live the rest of my life”…….for me I choose to REALLY llive!!

    Thanks for sharing….it is so good to see someone going thru the same journey and understand.

    • Darlene, I am so glad to hear of your awakening, and the results you are celebrating! Keep up the great work, and thanks for sharing my journey with me!

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